Saturday, December 31, 2011

Time and New Year

hello there,
Gambar time Eid-Adha :)

Asalamualaikum. Esok, tarikh: 1 Januari 2012. Lagi satu tahun telah berlalu. Pejam celik, pejam celik. Tanpa kita sedari, tahun 2011 sudah berakhir. Sekejap je kan? Semoga tahun baru ini (masihi punya tahun), kita semua menjadi yang lebih baik. Itu tipikal punya azam baru kan? :)

Lagi dua minggu nak exam, lagi empat bulan nak cuti easter, dan lagi enam bulan nak balik Malaysia. Tapi macam-macam boleh berlaku dalam jangka masa tu kan? Hanya Allah yang tahu.

Ini azam tahun baru saya:
1. Nak jadi seorang yang lebih aktif. Aspek? Hanya Dia dan saya yang tahu. ;p
2. Nak menjadi seorang yang lebih teratur dan sistematik. Mampukah?
3. Nak ada lagi lima teddy bear. ;)



Comeyh kan??? huhu. Nak mereka~~~

4. Nak jadi seorang anak yang baik dan patuh pada cakap ibu abah. (bukan dah ke? lols)


5. Nak berubah menjadi seorang yang cool. taknak jadi 'hot' dah. haha.

and the list goes on.......

Kebelakangan ni kan, saya rindu kat mamat yang selalu gaduh ngan saya waktu sekolah rendah. Kenapa? sebab tengok filem hindi. Shah Rukh Khan. Mamat ni, dulu, punya lah minat kat SRK ni. haha. Sampai sekarang kalau tengok SRK, mesti puya lah, teringat kat mamat ni. Mamat ni nama dia, Amirul 'Aizat.


To Aizat,
Dude. Lau ko baca ni, aku nak kasi taw kat ko, yang ko ni adalah salah satu sahabat yang paling baik aku ada. Maafkan aku sebab aku pernah 'membenci' ko. 
Sejak perkenalan kita, ko sememangnye mengenali diri aku. 
Ko akan sentiasa di sisi aku walaupun aku tidak selalu berada di sisi ko. 
Maaf ye. Aku harap ko akan bahagia. Ko akan berjaya.
 You are indeed a true friend to me. 

Thank you so much.

okay, bye! 

with love,


Winter Holiday

A month holiday was too short for me. I mean, time really flies. Isn't it? Now, I must start my revision for the examination. Where is my mood? MOOD! Come back to mummy. Mummy needs you. Stop the mood for dilly-dallying! :))

By the way, I went to York. York is famous for its Designer Outlets stores (D.O for short). I spent five days and four nights, staying at seniors' house. They are so lovely! I adore them so much. Being together with them really makes me feel loved. They are so caring. Although that was my first time meeting them, you really can't tell it when you see the bond between us. I, now, am missing them. So much. About my trip to York D.O, I bought three pairs of shoes; two pairs of Clarks shoes, and one pair of Reebok running shoes. And, a pair of tracksuit. I am so happy with my purchases! Wanna see them????





Yesterday, I skype-d with my beloved family. I miss them too lots. Alang and Adik really wanted to make me jealous. They showed me all the new things that have been bought. They even showed me their bedrooms. walaweyh! I want to go home. The best thing skype-ing with them was, that I could see my dearest parents' faces. I can see Abah and Ibu. I LOVE YOU BOTH!!!

Maybe that's all. See you again. Hope so. Mwaah! xoxo
BUHHBBYYYEE!!

On boat! ;p

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

missing.

i looked like i am happy. yes, sometimes. but i'm faking it.
i don't want my beloveds to be worrying about me. i hate to hear sighs from my beloveds. i always wish my beloveds are happy and no worries. i wish i can lightened the burdens of my beloveds. but, sometimes, vice verse occur, isn't it?

who loves to look the people who they love sighing and complaining all the time?
who likes to be a burden?
who adores to be hated?
none of us did. Right?

i've just recovered from my fever and flu. just a little left.
i miss my mom so much. i realised that i can't meet her till next summer. how i miss her.
too lot.

ibu,
akak terlampau sayangkan ibu.
akak minta maaf ye.
akak rindu ibu sangat2.
u will be beside me whenever i need you. 
u will love me whatever i did to you.
u will never leave me. i know. 
i am sorry to hurt you, i miss you so lot.


Saturday, October 1, 2011

ntah (",)

hey! i baru saja habis masak! bangga! haha. kenyang. lolx. bosan sekarang ni. masa ni je la ko boleh bosan zulaikha nadia oi! after this, kalau dah mula kelas tu, jangan harap lah ko boleh bersenang-lenang goyang kaki semua tu. haha

sebenarnya, aku kebosanan yang teramat sangat. en. froggy prince ada camping. nak calling-calling, takut ganggu. nak skyping, hampeh la kan? macam lah dia bawa segala laptop masuk hutan. apa lah ko ni nadia. apa kes kan? ;p

tomorrow, i mean, my current time, is 9.40 pm, 30 september, so TOMORROW which is 1 OCTOBER, is my dearest youngest brother's birthday.

adik, happy birthday yer! akak akan call adik lewat sikit taw, sebab takde kredit sekarang. so pagi esok, akak akan beli topup. sweet 14 my dear. grow stronger, healthier, smarter. be a good son to ibu and abah okay? you are the only son! no one else. so jangan main-main. jangan sesekali lukakan hati ibu dan abah. akak tahu adik sangat faham kan? ingat taw! nak hadiah? nanti akak bagi yer. tapi next year la ea. ;p

aku sangat sayangkan adik aku yang sorang ni. may Allah bless you always.

i think da cukup kowt. tiba-tiba rasa mengantuk. elok lah sangat, lepas makan, tidur! haha. tapi seriously, mengantuk sangat. that's all lovely, see you again. bubbye.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

alone and heart

a random post to express something truly deep inside from my heart.
no second thought, just speak it out.

deep in me, i am a loner. why?
I, myself do not know.
yes, it's pathetic.

from me to you,
i want you to be happy,
to know yourselves,
to feel full. not empty.

being lonely made me to start wondering,
to wonder far away,
some of my dearests have left me,
wondering when will i join them,
in what situation,
only He know.

alone in my little space,
triggers me that there are still people who loves me,
waiting for me, wanting to see me,
can i still meet them?

alone in this way,
just made me to re-read all sms in my phone,
i still have elder sisters those love me,
wanting me to be healthy, happy,
and with no worries.

being lonely,
i realise that i still have my family,
abah and ibu,
whose love are infinite for me,
no boundaries,
even if i've hurted them,
they love me.

while being alone,
a glimpse on photo frames on this desk,
searching for the warmth in the eyes,
to accompany me in this coldness.

being alone, yes, sometimes made us alive. to keep motivating ourselves. to remind us what we have lost and what we still posses. appreciate what you have.

dear abg cik, 
ya sangat rindukan abg cik. during my departure dat day, i thought of you. if you are still with us, you will come to see me, aren't you? i am sorry for not being able to see you at your last moment. we miss you.

Induction Programme

hari ni, hari kedua pergi induction programme.
waa!!! i'm alone. what i mean is in my course, i'm pretty sure that i'm the only malaysian.
susahla nak chit chat. huhu.
my current course is biomedical sciences with business.

baru sat td check e-mail from uni,
ada lah e-mail related to my programme.
lau tak silap, ada 5 orang je in  my course.
biomedical sciences ramai la, tapi with business, only 5!

doakan saya boleh cope yer!
amin. insyaAllah, nadia boleh!

teringat lirik lagu,
"jika kau fikirkan kau boleh, kau menghampiri kejayaan"
"jika kau fikirkan ragu-ragu, usahamu tidak menentu"

SO, FIKIRKAN KAU BOLEH! 

take care!

Monday, September 26, 2011

the new environment

long time no see, dear friends. it's not that i don't want to meet you but it's just the mood is not coming. :P

last 22 september 2011, i flew away from Malaysia with a mixed feeling.
sad to leave my loved ones, worrying if i will still meet them again, thinking about my life without them in the new place, thoughts never leave my mind, made me to keep thinking.

IS MY DECISION THE RIGHT ONE?
-thinking so many things have made me realised. No Pain No Gain.
- I need to sacrifice something, leaving my loved ones far away, to gain more knowledge.
- I pray that Allah keep my beloveds in good health. i want to meet them again.

long time before i took this path, i've already left my family for boarding school, but this time, it really takes a lot of time to realise they are so far away.

although abah couldn't come to send me at the airport, i could feel your presence abah. i know that you really love me as much as i love you.

dear ibu, i love you so much. i am sorry for the wrongs that i've done. i didn't mean to hurt your feelings. i love you so much. no one can replace you in my life. thank you for being a really wonderful mother. i promise you i'll go back in the summer holiday. insyaAllah.

to others, i really love you guys. it's just that i don't know how to express it. thank you for coming and giving me the moral supports. thank you.

to muhamad nazmi. i am sorry for not being able to talk to you that night. you know i want to right? i am sorry. thank you so much for coming. i heart you a lot.


Thursday, August 11, 2011

Penat

rasa apa sekarang?
macam nak nangis. tak tahu nak describe.

refresh site je. tapi takut nak dapat.
bila  tengok webpage keluar, lega sikit.
enter username dan password. crashed balik.
aduyai.
mesti ramai yang tengah senasib dengan aku.
takpe. cuba lagi.

INSYA-ALLAH. doakan kami.


Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Flying Butterfly



Result will be out soon. I'm getting nervous. Ya Allah. Please grant our pray. I pray that we will get the best for us. For friends. I pray that all of us will be in the right path. Do make it easy for us, dear Allah. Only You can help us right now.Amin.

Friends, this is only a word from me. Some people may think our words are harsh, so before we say it, please, DO PLAY IT IN YOUR MIND. Maybe you are just being sarcastic, but it may hurt others' feelings. Thus, in this 'barakah' Ramadhan, please mind your words, to be a dai'e is not via using harsh words. please. I almost cried when one of my friends told me about this. hope all of us can be wise in using words :))

macam keadaan aku sekarang. haha

Thursday, August 4, 2011

dugaan 1 ramadhan

asalamualaikum. salam ramadhan kalian.
tak sempat nak ucap pada 1 ramadhan hari tu.
tetiba saya perlu dikejarkan ke hospital disebabkan sakit perut.
doktor suspek apendiks.
tapi lain pulak jadinya bila tiba di wad kecemasan Hospital Sultanah Nur Zahirah (HSNZ), doktor tahan di wad dengan diagnosis 'twisted ovarian cyst'.
berdebar bkan mainla diri ini. ak tahu apa itu cyst bermaksud. ak tahu apa itu word ovarian dikaitkan.
masa itu jugaklah, aku rasa nak menangis je.
hati aku merintih bertanyakan kenapakah diri ini dipilih Allah s.w.t untuk menghadapi ujian ini.
ya rabbi.
kini aku da selamat. alhamdulillah. kisah perjalanan ini aku akan cerita nanti ye...

Sunday, July 17, 2011

sifat vs fitrah

sekarang, aku rasa sangat sedih. kenapa? aku pun tak tahu. kemungkinan aku tahu, tapi aku cuma nak menidakkan kemungkinan tersebut. entah. apa nak jadi, terserah. aku cuma ingin bahagia dengan hidupku sekarang. aku tak mahu orang luar merosakkan kebahagiaan keluargaku. bukan aku nak benci melayu, cuma aku benci sikap segelintir orang melayu. hasad dengki menguasai hati masing-masing. sampai sanggup mengorbankan prinsip dan pegangan agama. apalah sangat kemewahan hidup di dunia kalau diri itu sentiasa tidak berpuas hati dan dengki apabila kehidupan orang lain sedikit melebihi daripada kita. adakah kemewahan dunia itu kekal selamanya?

kerakusan manusia mencari harta meminggirkan perikemanusiaan sehinggakan darah daging sendiri pun sanggup diputusakn perhubungan, sanggup dijadikan musuh, sanggup dibuat itu ini. di manakah hati perutmu, wahai insan yang digelar MANUSIA? tidakkah kau ingat yang kita semua ini adalah cucu cicit Nabi Adam a.s? tidakkah kau ingat yang kita semua ini adalah umat Rasulullah s.a.w? adakah kau lupa yang kita semua ini adalah hamba Allah s.w.t? kalau kau ingat, tidak lupa perkara itu, manakah letaknya hati kemanusiaan dan logik akal fikiranmu yang sentiasa disanjungi itu, melupakan nurani yang dahagakan kebenaran?

sometimes, those what seems obvious, are not obvious like they seems to be.
something that is the truth is hidden beneath it.
and i pray that all of us can finally get the hidden truth..

Monday, July 11, 2011

hello.
penat sangat. kerja best. ada a new boy. a year senior than me. he's kind of cute. lolx. just joking. he's doing part time too, while waiting to start his second year in UIA Kuantan. He's doing Mathematics. Cool huh? ;)

enough the rants.
my objectives for this post is to tell that ;
-  my left leg is 'ill' ( i 'terseliuh' =forgot what in english! laugh okay? )
- i am currently happy with my life. i feel that i am surrounded with happiness. Alhamdulillah. may this will last long.
- i am purely nervous. about? you know what. ;(
- my friends who did the IB ( International Baccalaureate) succeed with flying colours. congrats you all. pray that i'll be joining you guys too. :)
- yang ni penting! i have successfully baked a cheesecake! a marvelous one. people who taste it, said that it was yummy. and friends of my younger sister asked the recipe for it. hehe. (padahal resepi internet je pon.)


tomorrow, i'll be working in the morning. alone to take care the petrol pump. he's working in the evening. bertambah penatla esok.

sayonara. :)




Saturday, July 9, 2011

works.

kaki terseliuh. jalan terhincut-hincut kat workplace.
sedih. esok, ibunda saya cakap nak bawak ke tempat tukang urut.
PuhH! dah la kaki yer. baikla cepat. ;(

seronok gak kerja. walaupun baru beberapa hari kerja (4hari), rasa cam da lama je.
saya suka kerja pada syif ( betol ke eja camtu?) malam. kurang penat. hehe.
plus,  workmates pun cambest!

masa kerja, ramai yang datang i.e customers yang baru balik dari masjid.
sejuk hati saya. kan best lau saya pun boleh cam tu jugak.
lagi best kalau suami saya nanti sentiasa pergi masjid. amin.
tak nak lah yang lagha sangat.
memang impian setiap perempuan, i supposed it is, nak suami yang mampu membimbing ke arah yang lebih baik kan? mampu membantu diri untuk mengukuhkan keimanan kepada Allah s.w.t.
saya sentiasa mendoakan perkara itu.
Amin...

awak. saya harap awak semua dalam keadaan sihat tau. jangan sakit cam saya ni. TAKE CARE! sayonara.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

part time + results

it has been a while since my last entry. yes, i did miss my blog but I've no idea what to type. plus, I'm currently doing part-time job at a petrol station near to my house. this is where my younger sis has been doing part-time since last three months. so, HERE I AM doing the same thing.

yes! it's hard enough to get money with your own effort but i am glad that i'm given the chance to try. at least, i'll not do nothing at home except eat,sleep,eat again, and so-on while waiting for the results.

talking about the results,
- i am totally freaking out! takut sangat2. ;(
- i always pray that we'll be joining our seniors too.
- it'll be out in middle of august. if i'm not mistaken.
- i've not yet give my e-mail to the account department. how ah?
- about the unis, i also have some confusion. what to do, how, when. and others too. who can help me?

i am sorry. my phone is not functioning well. ye la. telefon pon zaman apa da. huhu. i want to buy a phone that can only text and call. haha. not so much functions. mana tak nye, fon canggih2 sumer cpt rosak. takpe2. i revert to the original. :PP

today, my working shift is in the evening. i'll start at 3 plus pm and ends at 11 pm. :))

okay, that's all.

p/s: i've to tell you guys that i succeed in baking cake myself! and i also succeed in creating my own recipe. new ea? okay la, modified one. i am happy with it. hehe. in the process to learn being a good daughter and wife-to-be. haha :)

i want to upload a picture of doa that i snapped from a book;


Monday, June 27, 2011

i miss you so much. i'll update soon.
sorry. cam la ada yg menunggu.. haha.. tak kisah la. nk ckp "SORRY" jugak!

really, truly from my heart, I HEART YOU all!! ;))

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

LNL

hey there. ada idea tak cmner nak hilangkan sakit gigi cpt2? huhu
i miss my FRIENDS so much..

you! You! and YOU!
you know right, that i really your presence? i really wanna see you guys. wanna hug you guys! huhu. i miss you sooooooooooo lot.

last night, my sweet, cute baby has messaged me. she got a new number. da berapa tahun tak jumpa dia. windu! plan nak jumpa dia next week tapi dia tengah exam lagi. dia ni NUR LAILY HAMDAN. i miss her. LIYANA AMALINA ADNAN too..<3

a picture of us for you:
~laily, liyana, me~

Friday, June 3, 2011

worry.

salam. long time no see. haha. macam la ada yang menunggu.

HEY! I FINISHED MY A-LEVEL EXAMS! yahoo!
i'm already at home. i went back as soon as i finished my last paper last wednesday. although i'm not too happy with it, at least i've given my best. what to do now is only pray and tawakkal. InsyaAllah HE will help us no matter what happens. right?

i'm worried with my beloved abah's diabetes now. last medical check-up, my mom said that his blood glucose level was too high. i don't know what to do. i really wish that i can help him to lower his blood glucose level. what adds to make me worry more is what my younger sis had told me. that day, there was a minor cut on abah's foot, and the ants were there too! i was really, really shocked! it does made me worried! i really hope that at least, his glucose concentration in blood decrease. to a safer level. ;(

someone, sape2 yang ada taw resepi sihat for diabetics, please let me know.
i have searched for them on the internet, but none that really satisfies me.
i do always pray and hope abah will be recovered from his current condition.
i want to see you, abah, as healthy as before.
we, indeed, the real me too, are missing you. too lot.

i'll be back. i wanna watch u-kiss chef kiss! i'd fallen in 'love' with the group's maknae, baby dong-ho!

p/s: td pergi kenduri kahwin kenalan aku.terimbau kenangan lama. pengantin lelaki tu dulu sama tempat mengaji. he was know as Bad Boy kat tempat tu. haha. tiba2 adik aku citer sal mamat tu kat ibu aku, yang mamat tu ske flirt ngan aku dlu. haha.. siyez lawak dowh! lau engat blik. tp adik dia girl, xla kamceng ngan aku. ada magnetic repulsion gitu. wahaha!

pps: sherah! lau baca nieyh, anda blik x??? :))

Friday, May 20, 2011

YOU!!!

damn you! it's not cursing. i just let out my anger.
to feel betrayed. what?
you really s****...

if u don't, say it! if u did, admit! as easy as ABC.
u don't even have the right to do like this.
u don't have the right to treat people this way!

please think whatever you've done. cause it might make people irritated.

to that someone, YOU please do not come again!
go elsewhere. find your others. but not ME!
understood?
i'm no longer as innocent as before.
i'm a grown up. so just let me do my way.
i know it. YOU please straighten your beliefs and relationships. YOU got a lot of stuffs to be cleared up! don't ever YOU try to mess with me again.
if not, YOU know what'll happen.

typed-in-totally-disappointed,

Monday, May 9, 2011

09052011






salam. it has been so long since i updated for the last one.
my lappy rosak. bukan lappy actually. it's the charger. huhu.
my phone's charger pon rosak jugak. i pinjam my prince pye since he didnt use nokia phone anymore. :)

i really miss to write. it was very tiring to hold the feelings deep inside the heart, trying to keep the pace with others. i've been feeling not so well for few days. lucky for me as my first paper willl be on next monday.

recently, i've been in a situation. a very difficult one. i'm too exhausted.
what is it?
to be in problems with my loved ones.
not jus a person, too many.
people those are so important to me. their presence are meaningful to me.

saturday's evening, my relative passed away. she was my mother's stepmom.
Al-Fatihah. semoga roh nek dicucuri rahmatNya.

today, i went to see the matron. both matrons scolded me as my face was very pale.
they asked me to do the Hb count. haha. fine, i'll do after i finish my A2 exams.
my blood pressure is normal but my 'nadi' is too high. pelik..
enough talking rants.

this final exam will determine my future.

ibu, akak sayang ibu sangat2.
doakan akak yer. i miss u too loadz. really wanna cry at your shoulders.
sbnrnye mmg akak nak sgt ibu dtg cam ibu cakap.
tp i dont want to burden you. i heart you.

dear prince,
i miss you. btw, happy anniversary... hope this will never end!

LOVE <3

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

lamanye tak hapdet... xsempat la... haha

kind of busy lately.. but i'm happy with myself right now.. :)

ari nie, saya dengan jayanya telah masak kari ayam! kangkung & bendi goreng kicap...
xsangka yang saya mampu masak kari ayam..
sedap tu....
bley x masuk bakul angkat sendiri? haha

tak lama lagi trial A2.. lagi 2 minggu lebey je lagi..
saya harus berusaha! yes!

btw, i've met a girl that i can really talk to in kyuem. thank you Allah. :)

pergi dulu yer. i wanna bake a cake now.. hehe tata

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Memories and Hopes

lately, i'm feeling so gloomy. whatever happens, i am still me. why don't you try to understand me? sad memories  love to accompany me recently.

losing people who i cared. knowing people that i love suffers. i can't stand pretending i am not crying.

brother redzwan, why did you left me so early? when i was in year 6? why? u left me without saying anything to me. without i knew that you suffered brain cancer. without saying thank you to you. it did really hurt. but i know u'll be among the solihins. i've none of you pictures but the memories will always be in my mind. thanks to teach me the value of life. breathe into others.

syazwan asyraf. you are one of my bestest friend. i am sorry for not being so close to you. i am sorry for declining your invitation to study together. i miss you sketching smileys on my papers. i miss those smileys. so much. honestly, i feel so sad when you left us without saying goodbye. without saying anything to me. you know what. it took me a lot of effort to realise that you've left. you did hear what i said when i met you in the room ryte? i asked you to come back, to quarrel with me. and i saw you nodded. but why?

i am not wronging The Mighty One. i know His decision is the best. but i was really lost. just now, husna and i talked about you. we miss you friend. the moment we started to be close, i'll remember forever. the moment you changed your stand from agreeing with the statement to disagree with it, as that time, i was alone to defense my stand. thank you a lot. i know i was the first girl who you become really close with. you told me ryte? you told me, if it isn't me, you'll never have the confidence to talk to other girls. and i'm happy to see you get along with others. syazwan, you have seen me ryte in the ielts class? without you. i easily find my shoes. i win! yes! but i miss your presence.;( i pretended to be happy in front of our teachers showing that i was doing well without you. in chemistry class, there's no one to talk with anymore. i miss ms qila scolded us," dya, tak abis2 borak ngan syazwan" even though that time you asked me chem questions. i miss those moments. whenever we entered the class together, she said, " korang ni xabis2 dating, datang kelas pon sama-sama", the cause was we were from the same previous class right? don't you miss it? tell me.

whenever i do my presentation, i'll see you sitting there. cause i miss you interrupting my presentation. asking question. what i miss the most is when you said, " SPEAK UP DYA! YOU CAN DO IT" when it is my turn to do the speaking test. i waited for you to do your jokes but u never come back and i never do my jokes after that. i miss you really lot. not just me, our other friends also miss you.

the time you were in ICU, i really pray that you'll come back. i dreamed of you. i dreamed that you opened the ielts class door, and standing there. smiling to me. without saying anything. i believed, that was a hint from Allah that you'll come back. but Allah know best. thank you for willing to come in my dream. i really appreciated it. i know you'll watch us from there. i admitted that i am still not fully recovered from your leave. but i'll try harder not to weep again. i am sorry syazwan for weeping of this. i am really sorry.

abg cik. please stay strong. don't be weak. kakcik, zarin, anis, aisyah, ainul and me myself still need you. ya minta maaf sebab xdapat selalu jenguk abang cik. ya xdapat nak bantu abang cik tahan kesakitan abang cik. ya taw abang cik sakit sangat. for not being able to sleep well t night, severe headache at anytime. you look so thin nowadays. ya nak sgt abg cik sihat cam dulu. boleh kita main mercun. boleh kita borak2. abg cik. abg cik kuat kn? abg cik akan bertahan kan? ya yakin dengan Allah yg abg cik akan sembuh. ya nak abg cik ada time ya kahwin nanti. even you are only my brother-in-law, but i feel that you are my real brother. ya nak abang cik dan abah ada time ya kahwin. ya nak korg tengok anak ya plak. please yer. be there for me.

abah. ya sayang sangat kat abah. walaupun abah sakit da lama, ya still harap yg abah akan sembuh balik. abah taw kn yang ya sayang sgt2 kat abah? ya minta maaf sbb ya xpandai nak tunjuk yg ya sayangkan abah. kalau bley, ya nak peluk abah selalu cam ya kecik2 dulu. ya rindu abah bawak ya jalan2. belikan teddy bear paling besar utk ya. ya taw abah rasa abah xmampu bantu ibu. abah. ibu, ya, angah, adik dan alang semuanya sentiasa doakan abah sembuh balik. ya sedih sangat bile abah menitikkan air mata saat ya salam ngan abah before ya nak balik kolej. ya nak sangat abah dapat anta ya ke kolej. ya rindu abah datang ke majlis penyampaian hadiah ya. ya nak abah ada bersama ngan ibu. tengok ya kat atas pentas. ya sangat2 sayangkan abah. abah kena kuat! abah taw ya sayang abah. abah kena ada time ya nak kahwin. abah nak tengok anak ya kn? abah nak tengok ya kahwin kn? abah nak tengok ya berjaya kan? t abah akan tengok ya kahwin. ya nak abah tengok siapa suami ya nanti. abah akan restui kami berdua kan?

(i am typing this in tears. i am sorry. but i miss these guys )
please pray for my abah and abg cik too.

abah, abang cik. please be with me. i know both of you are strong. abah. you are my superhero. no one else. abang cik, you are my lifesaver. thank you.

syazwan, brother redzwan. do pray for me., i know you guys are watching me. i know you are with the solihins. have a nice journey there.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

someone

when i'm feeling so fulfilled, why must i feel this way?
why must it came? i'm disliking this so much.
who the hell in the world love to feel sad, right?

my tears won't stop flowing out.
maybe it did for my naked eyes,
but it won't in my heart.

and i really miss to be accompanied by someone.
someone who really cares.
who really feels what am i feeling.

dear someone,
please. do come back in my life.
i need you to soothe me out.
i need you to cheer me up.
i need you to be when i'm despaired.
i need you to hear me even if i'm not able to say any word.

dear someone,
i hope you read this.
i want you to know that you are a piece of puzzle i can't bear losing it.
i realise that you are someone to me.
so, please be kind to me.


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Lelaki & Wanita

Asalamualaikum and Good Day. 
saya ada perkara nak share dgn korang. jom baca.
saya dapat ini from sum1's facebook


WANITA: Siapa yang paling kamu cintai di dunia ini?
LELAKI: Kamu!!!
WANITA: Menurut kamu, saya ini siapa?
LELAKI: (Berfikir sejenak, lalu menatap WANITA dengan pasti) Kamu, tulang rusukku.


Kerana Allah melihat bahawa Adam kesepian. Saat Adam sedang lena tidur, Allah mengambil rusuk Adam dan menciptakan Hawa. Semua LELAKI mencari tulang rusuknya yang hilang dan saat menemukan wanita untuknya, tidak lagi merasakan sakit di hatinya...

Setelah berkahwin, pasangan itu mengalami masa yang indah dan manis untuk sementara. Setelah itu, pasangan muda ini mulai tenggelam dalam kesibukan masing-masing dan kelelahan hidup yang ada. Hidup mereka menjadi membosankan.

Kenyataan hidup yang kejam membuat mereka mulai menyisihkan impian dan cinta satu sama lain.

Mereka mulai bertengkar dan pertengkaran itu mulai menjadi semakin panas. Pada suatu hari pada akhir sebuah pertengkaran WANITA lari keluar rumah. Saat tiba di seberang jalan, dia berteriak "Kamu tidak cintakan saya lagi!!!".
LELAKI sangat membenci ketidakdewasaan WANITA dan secara spontan juga berteriak "Saya menyesali perkahwinan ini! Kamu ternyata bukan tulang rusukku!!!" Tiba-tiba WANITA terdiam, dan berdiri kaku untuk beberapa saat.
LELAKI menyesali akan apa yang sudah dia lafazkan, tetapi seperti air yang telah tertumpah tidak mungkin untuk diceduk kembali. Dengan berlinang air mata, WANITA kembali ke rumah dan mengambil barang-barangnya, bertekad untuk berpisah. "Kalau saya bukan tulang rusukmu, biarkan saya pergi Biarkan kita berpisah dan mencari pasangan sejati masing-masing".


Lima tahun berlalu. LELAKI masih belum lagi berkahwin, tetapi berusaha mencari khabar akan kehidupan WANITA. 

WANITA pernah ke luar negeri tetapi sudah kembali. Dia pernah berkahwin dengan seorang asing dan bercerai.

LELAKI agak kecewa bila mengetahui WANITA tidak menunggu, sepertinya. Dan di tengah malam yang sunyi, dia meminum kopinya dan merasakan sakit di hatinya. Tetapi LELAKI tidak sanggup mengakui bahawa dia merindukan WANITA.

Suatu hari, mereka akhirnya bertemu kembali. Di airport, tempat di mana banyak terjadi pertemuan dan perpisahan, mereka dipisahkan hanya oleh sebuah dinding pembatas.

LELAKI: Apa khabar?
WANITA: Baik... Kamu sudah menemui tulang rusukmu yang hilang?
LELAKI: Belum. 
WANITA: Saya akan terbang ke New York dengan penerbangan berikut. Saya akan kembali 2 minggu lagi. Telefon saya kalau kamu berkesempatan. Kamu tahu nombor telepon saya kan ? Tidak ada yang berubah. WANITA tersenyum manis, berlalu di hujung lafaz "Selamat tinggal.."

Satu minggu kemudian, LELAKI menerima khabar WANITA adalah salah seorang korban Menara WTC. Malam itu, sekali lagi, LELAKI meneguk kopinya dan kembali merasakan sakit dihatinya.

Akhirnya dia sedar bahwa sakit itu adalah kerana WANITA, tulang rusuknya sendiri yang telah dengan bodohnya dia patahkan.


*Kita menempiaskan 99% kemarahan walau kepada orang yang paling kita cintai. Dan akibatnya adalah penyesalan. Seringkali penyesalan itu datang dikemudiannya, akibatnya setelah kita menyedari kesalahan kita, semua sudah terlambat...*

*Kerana itu, **jagalah dan sayangilah orang yang dicintai dengan sepenuh hati.**.. Sebelum mengucapkan sesuatu berfikirlah dahulu, apakah kata-kata yang kau ucapkan akan menyakiti orang yang dicintai?

Kira merasakan akan *menyakitinya, sebaiknya jangan pernah dilafazkan. Kerana semakin besar risiko untuk kehilangan orang yang dicintai.*

*Jadi berfikirlah, apakah kata-kata yang akan dilafazkan sebanding dengan akibat yang akan diterima?? *

Friday, February 18, 2011

its true...
i really miss you..
d old us..
enjoyin d moments..

admit dat miss you n love you loadz..

Thursday, February 17, 2011

my stars

how i wish to touch the stars.
how i wish to really shine and be your guide during the night.
and how i wish to be your accompany wherever you are.

stars, i wish i am you.
glittering in the dark sky giving hopes to others.
calming me whenever i need you.

stars, please don't leave me.
do show yourselves as often as you could.
i know you'll be there.

oh Allah. please do help us. amin.

a star song: my favouritas!




Twinkle twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are.
Up above the world so high,
Like a diamond in the sky.
Twinkle twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are.

When the blazing sun is gone
When he nothing shines upon
Then you show your little light
Twinkle, twinkle, all the night.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are.

Then the traveler in the dark
Thanks you for your tiny spark.
He could not see where to go,
If you did not twinkle so.
Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are!

In the dark blue sky you keep,
While you thro' my window peep,
And you never shut your eye,
Till the sun is in the sky,
Twinkle, twinkle, little star,
How I wonder what you are!


Line Celcom

celcom!!! kenapakah dikau berbuat sedemikian kepada kami warga KYUEM?
sanggup dikau mendukacitakan kami?

sekarang, padan muka ko sebab da ramai nk tukar maxis.. haha
membazir je dapat free call one week tp xley guna!
wasteful giler... semua salah celcom!
xpe2 ko wat cmnie kn... sedeyh aku...

harap2 celcom dapat betulkan line nie secepat mungkin yer..
please celcom... :(

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Underlying Hopes

i miss my beloved so much. why do i need to be separated with them? i don't wrong Allah cause i believe He has  decided the best for me. maybe through this distances, i'll become a more bold person. not dependent of others. i'll also believe that He wants to train me for the future. who knows what'll happen right? except Him The Only One.

i, now, could see the beautiful things those waiting for me. i realise happiness will come to me. even it's not everyday, i hope it'll be everlasting. though some people will keep trying to destroy it, as part of their jealousy, i definitely trust my beloved, that they'll always be with me.

some people may just pretend who they are. don't do that cause who ever you are, it is you! don't ever try to backstabbing your friends. cause they'll know through their instincts that you've done so. same goes to another relation. whatever you do, if you tried really hard to lie, please don't, just admit it cause honesty is the best policy. isn't it?


i'm giving too much. and i don't get why certain people just keep the small matters exacerbated? or it's just me who are paying too much attention? i don't know what's exactly the answer. but one thing that i'm really sure is they are just being too insensitive towards other feelings.


hey! the way you guys talk to others may hurt them okay. try to remind yourself of people's feeling. if you want to win, just, please don't hurt others. the habit sucks.

my dearest, 
i love you all and miss you like hell heaven right now

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

spider?

it's 9th February! 
My prince spiderman's birthday! <3

he's prince spiderman! :P



With each year I'll love you more. Remember that your best years are still ahead of you and I'll be there for every up down and in between.

It's your birthday and I can't be there
But I'll send you a special birthday wish and a little prayer
Have a happy birthday
I hope that all of your birthday wishes come true
May you have a great time today and find happiness in everything you do.


i found a quote. and it can motivate us.

"Whatever with the past has gone, The best is always yet to come."
- Lucy Larcom


whatever have passed, let bygones be bygones.
the future is waiting for us. :))



dear, happy birthday. aishiteru

Monday, January 31, 2011

Help Us

Asalamualaikum.

Saya sangat risau ngan keadaan kwn2 kita Mesir sekarang nie. Keadaan agak genting. Based on what I heard on the news, it's getting more dangerous there. The prisoners escaped as the prisons and police stations were on fire. They also took the weapons from the polices. Can you imagine how scary the situation is? I hope all of Malaysians and Muslims will be safe. 

Ya Allah, please save us, help us. amin.

For sure, a lot of families are currently worried about this. Me too. Some of my friends are there. There are my former classmates in TGB. I really hope they'll be fine. What really triggers me to write this is I heard there was a    Malaysian student was raped last night. It certainly frightens the others. Plus, there were burglars roaming around the houses area. I just hope that they'll be safe and certainly can come home safely.

ALLAHUMMAN SURIL ISLAM WAL MUSLIMIN,
 FI KULLI MAKAN. 
WA KULLI ZAMAAN.
AMEEN YA RABB!

this doa, I take from here

guys. please do pray for our friends there. 
do say it after your prayer. each prayer. it's the only way we can help them.
Alhamdulillah as we are still living in a peaceful country, and please,
 Ya Allah, do help us to retain this tranquility. 

Sunday, January 30, 2011

My 48 Minutes Survey

Instruction: Once you are tagged, answer all the questions honestly. No lying or cheating.

Starting time: 2.43 pm

Name: Siti Zulaikha Nadia Muhamad @ Mokhtar
Brother(s): 1
Eye colour: Dark Brown almost to Black ( not really black like sherah's ;)).
Shoe size: 7. depends on the brands. sometimes 6 or 8.
Hair: last cut by myself in front of the mirror in L-15's toilet. owh yeayh!
Piercings: Few times, but i still can't wear the earrings. ;(
Height: 161 cm.
What am I wearing right now: Old jeans & t-s.
Where do you live: Terengganu.
Favourite number: 13.
Favourite drink: Hot Chocolate / Apple Juice.
Favourite month: February.
Favourite breakfast: Baked beans and omelette with toast( wholegrain bread) :).

Have I ever -

1. Broken a bone - Nope. But I think i'd been severely wounded on my nose cartilage. my brother's fault. haish.
2. Been in a police car - No. Kena saman pernah la. haha
3. Fallen for a friend - Yes. (not exactly friend, haha)
4. Fallen for a guy/girl in a short period of time - I don't really understand this.
5. Swam in the ocean - during my childhood la.
6. Fallen asleep in school - Yes. So many times but I've never been spotted. LOL
7. Broken someone's heart - I don't know. If I've done so, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that.
8. Cried when someone died - Yes.
9. Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call - Maybe. But I'll fall asleep while waiting. ;p
10. Saved e-mails - Yes. Meaningful and important ones.
11. Been cheated on - I've no idea. by 'friends', maybe. ;(

What -

1. Does your room look like: currently, a little girl's room. with so many cartoons decoration. soon, MY room.:)
2. Is right beside you: Beybey.*showing his cute face*
3. Is the last thing you ate: Snekku, i found on the table in the container. ;)

Ever had -

1. Chicken pox: Not really sure. My mom said i've none but my trial to infect myself with sherah's was unsuccessful. ( giler punyer kerja! :O)
2. Sore throat: Yes.
3. Stitches: Nope.
4. Broken nose:  I'm not sure mine was broken or not. 

Do you -

1. Believe in love at the first sight: Yes. Maybe. Influenced by fairy tales. lolx
2. Like picnics: Not really. But I will go if my beloved ones want me to go. :)

Who -

1. Did you last yell at - A huge spider! That made me ended up sleeping in my sis's bed
2. Was the last person you danced with - Hardly remembered. Beybey, I suppose.
3. Last made you smile - Ibu, when she woke me up this morning before she goes to work.

Final Questions

1. What are you listening to right now - Birds chirping and the wind blowing
2. What did you do today - have a bathe, watched Kung Foot, cooked spaghetti bolognaisse sauce for lunch, text to my prince, talked to Beybey, blogwalking, weigh myself, lying on bed typing this. >.<
3. Are you the oldest - Yes, but I've two pretty elder sisters. But i'm the KakYong. *_*
4. Indoors or outdoors - Both.

Today did you -

1. Talk to someone you like - Yes.
2. Kiss anyone - Yup. My Beybey.
3. Sing - Not yet.
4. Talk to an ex - No. I've none.
5. Miss someone - Yes. ;(
6. Eat - Yes. Breakfast and lunch are vital meals. ;))

Last person who -

1. You talked on the phone - Ibu to tell her that I've arrived at YT last night.
2. Made you cry - Anonymous? huh.
3. Went to the movies with - My ex classmates in form 5 together with Ummu and Faiz Fikri. yeah. so long ago.
4. Went to the malls with - Mr. Nazmi, but last went shopping with Sherah. is Grand Union considered as a mall? ;P
5. Cheered you up - Jaha and Sherah. In YT bus last nite. ;)

Have you -

1. Been to Mexico - Nope.
2. Been to USA - No. 


Random-

1. Have a crush on someone - Yes. :)
2. Books that you're reading - Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps.( perasan x sme cm sherah's? hehe)
3. Best feeling in the world - Loved.
4. Future kids names - If girls, Nadia must be included. If boys, of course my hubby's name included. right, d? *wink*
5. Do you sleep with a stuffed animal - Is Beybey an animal? Bear? huhu
6. What's under your bed - A pile of old magazines.
7. Favourite sports - Swimming, badmintn and jogging. :P
8. Favourite places - Bedroom and wherever as long as I'm with my family.
9. Who do you really hate - The ones those who badly destroy my family's happiness. S***
10. Do you have a job - Officially not yet. I'm a student, future graduate, a doctor-to-be( godwilling ) and His slave.
11. What time is it now - 3.31 p.m


With however long you took, post as "My __ Minutes Survey" and tag 15 people.

it really took me times to type these. finally,

SHERAH!
saya da bwat tag awak.

people to tag;
favourite people. love you all. :)
ms ila syamilla
ms mudd
ms aisya 

sincerely,